Hands up if you’ve ever had a traumatic experience that you felt changed you. I’ll go first: in 2010 I had my colon removed due to cancer, and shortly after that I found out I had Lynch syndrome, which is a genetic condition that makes me more likely to get certain types of cancer in the future. I’ve written a lot about these experiences, particularly about how they have affected me emotionally. I’ve also thought a lot about how they have changed me as a person, and I’ve come to the conclusion that it hasn’t all been negative. In some ways, I’ve even changed for the better. Here are three things to think about that may help you feel better about your bad experiences too, whatever those may be.