Winter time almost kicked in. Honestly, I hate winter. It’s cold and grey in the morning and it is very easy to find reasons to stay in bed until the alarm clock goes nuts. It brings a weird state of coma. It’s almost comforting. But at the same time it’s not. There is nothing comforting about being almost in a vegetative state. So there I was 2 days ago. 6am in the morning. Still in bed and planning to stay there until at least 10am. Desperate to chase more dreams and forget about reality. A habit of not switching the ringtone off did its best to wake me up. What the hell? Who had the guts to embark on the journey to save me from myself at such an early hour? I did. There was a reminder to do something that matters today. So I did it for the 5th time.
You Are Worthy
Annoying feeling of not giving enough is almost a best friend of mine. I always wanted to do more, to push myself beyond beliefs. To know that my efforts and actions are worthy and that what I do helps people. In a previous post I failed to tell my story, to make it more personal. Forgive me for that. Forgive me for not being able to open up fully. A year ago I was in deep depression and in need to be and feel useful. I’m sure, every person in the world makes a difference and it’s a fact. But something inside me always questions myself if it’s really true. So it suddenly hit me and blew the wind out of my mind. I typed something like: how to save a life and millions of links appeared, but I only choose one. So I enrolled for the blood donating session for the first time a year and 3 months ago. And ever since every 3 month I’m giving blood as a donor. This brought completely new feeling to me – the feeling of total connection with likeminded people desperate to help others and people who really strive to do something that matters today, tomorrow, always.
I got up at 6 in the morning. Not the best of my personal achievements but it was quite a challenge as I am an owl. So I got myself busy with millions of well-organised tasks. Among them was a blood donating session I was so looking forward to. And as I walked by the Oxford street something liberating came to my mind: I AM WORTHY. YOU ARE WORTHY. Let’s make a difference together.
Death is an inescapable reality and men die daily, but good deeds live forever. – Jesse Jackson
Every day brings us an endless strain of opportunities to explore more, to develop ourselves and discover new depths of our kind hearts. It brings us new understanding and new challenges to accept. Every day brings up the best in us in order to move forward and do something amazing with our lives realising how fragile it can be. We help each other grow.
We need to find more opportunities to help people… We need to find a desire to do more for the others in order to open up our hearts fully and be kinder. Whenever I go for the blood donating session all my misunderstandings with people seem to me so small and pointless. In that moment I can truly feel my heart filling up with love to those I don’t even know…. I just feel one desire – to give.
To be doing good deeds is man’s most glorious task. Sophocles
So it doesn’t matter what the season may be outside in the window when you do something amazing and dedicating your life to good deeds. You forget about something that you may not proud of that was done in the past. If you are not proud of that something – it never makes you a bad person, it makes you human with a tendency to make lots of mistakes.
It’s very easy to choose to become a victim of depression, but who said we are here to settle for that?! We are here to live an extraordinary life, full of wonders, small and big discoveries, new challenges and things to go after. Every minute counts. Wherever you are, I hope you are succeeding. Today, tomorrow and always!
By Lesya Li
Photo by Anna Strepetova