Is there anything specific that we can do to move up the pyramid and get to a point where we are flourishing and thriving instead of just surviving? YES!

If we don’t understand ourselves in a deeper more meaningful way then how can we expect anyone else to understand us and value us and love us for all that we are? And if we don’t understand who we are and what makes us thrive then how can we be all that we want to become?

How many of you reading this act differently depending on the groups of people you find yourself surrounded with? The social, or work, or family chameleon that changes color to blend in with their surroundings.

Do you worry about social occasions where everyone will be together; work and friends and loved ones all in the same room? How on Earth are you going to be everything that everyone expects you to be? Here’s a sign: if you do this then you are not happy in your own skin, you don’t have enough self-love or self-esteem to be you as you are 100% all of the time because in some way you feel that you aren’t good enough as you are.

Let your innate wisdom bring you answers

Several years ago I started to listen to myself trying to work out who I was without the influence of anyone else.

I found myself on a spiritual journey. Through time in nature and meditation, I began to piece together the real authentic Katherine Deamer. It matters not how you do it but give yourself the opportunities to connect to you; time out in silence, giving yourself the gift of time, that precious commodity that we give to everyone and everything except ourselves. The time where you listen to your thoughts and your beliefs about your life and start to address the things you feel uneasy about.

Now is always the best time to take ownership of yourself and commit to living a life where you can thrive

Of course, this all takes time and introspection and patience to get to know yourself better. It takes self-care and positive self-talk and dropping resistance to change to actually feel truly at peace, giving to yourself the encouragement and love that you would give to others. From now on you are your biggest focus and priority.

Move your perception to one of self-love and understanding. Nothing bad happens to you if you start to put your self first. We are not talking selfishness here, we’re not talking arrogance or thoughtlessness. It’s about finding where you feel best, where your passion for life lives, where your happiness is grown and starting to develop the spark of energy and passion and creativity within you.

Of course it might not be easy to turn that Cruise Liner of your life to face a different direction but through perseverance, courage, desire and a will to take action where it’s needed you will learn to love who you really are and start to live the life you turned up for, the life you deserve. And before you decide that what you actually deserve isn’t much, because of your poor self-image or lack of self-esteem, I want you to know that you deserve the best; the best life, the best relationships, the best future.

If we don’t have this self-love then we are fearful and we look to others to fill that gap. But I want you to know that that gap is actually ‘you’ shaped. There is no one that can make you happy. You have to love yourself fiercely without conditions and most importantly without ego. For the ego criticizes us, it holds us down and it also makes us boast and preen and try so hard to get the validation from others that we so desperately need to make us feel appreciated.

Only self-love can eliminate the fear of failing, or not being good enough, or successful enough, or rich enough, or beautiful/handsome enough.

For when you fear life as yourself, then you fear to live bigger and brighter, and your path to success is immediately blocked.

So what blocks us? Competition and comparison are fear based and block us. Society today is full to bursting with people trying to out-do each other in every way. We can search for the life that we see portrayed all over social media and colleagues and friends lives seem so much more successful than ours. But what is a success?

Success is true happiness and true happiness is an inside job. So who are YOU? What makes you feel the freedom you desire to be everything that you really are? To find out we must Love ourselves back to emotional health knowing that a journey to you cannot be rushed.

Get into creative energy, vision your desired life, see it, feel it is already here and take the appropriate actions to bring it into reality. Focus only on the good, focus on what can be. Living in the present moment, mindfully, where everything is in your control.

As you accept yourself as you are now, your past, old self-criticism and judgment, envy and any sense of lack, then you are opening up to being happy. Remembering that we give out what we receive and our thoughts become reality so think and act positively. This takes time and persistence but it will become a healthy and happy habit if you stay alert to it.

Break out of your comfort zone, the one that is keeping you inside a box that you do not want to remain in. Breaking free takes courage but this is just one small step, it may feel like a giant leap of faith but you know, deep down, that you desire this change and if everything stays the same then everything stays the same.

It’s time to take the fear out of the unknown by broadening your sense of self, gradually becoming the you that you want to be, making sure that you keep that light inside you burning brightly because you will need it to illuminate your path to that better life that you are creating.