Our life is built on many grounds (or plateaus), many of which aren’t ever really our own. We start off as children in a home that is built with a lifestyle we must abide by and our first lessons to stand on. We then go to school and conform to another ground of rules of being – to fit in, to follow rules, to do your work. Then we go into the world and find jobs/careers with rules and environments to follow. These are all grounds that are laid out for us, that we must walk through to eventually find our own.

These thoughts have come to me as I’ve gotten older, along with discovering the same perspective in the book “Instinct: The Power to Release Your Inborn Drive” by T.D. Jakes. I’m about half-way through but something tells me the timing of my need to read this book coincides with the next part of my growth – forming my own ground.

I’m grateful to know that a lot of what has built me has been what I can call home, as I’m sure many of us feel or at the least can acknowledge. Home is our beginning. It’s our first lesson on how to be, it is our core values and our first memories on what it looks like to build ground. But home isn’t our only teacher. As we grow we learn that there are things we would do differently, paths that we have to re-learn how to build in a more positive way.

As I’ve gotten older and have finally been on my own away from what I’ve always known, I’ve realized I’ve known nothing. I only knew what I was around; a mere product of my environment.
My thoughts were planted seeds I did not water but had nurtured. They were my way to survive and see the world – always on guard, unable to trust, unable to feel heard. I lived in it and accepted it for so long that it became my only ground to stand on. Yet I was not stable.

I wish I had known that in all that time all I had to do was step away, and step into my own ground, regardless if it was a dirt ground without any real concrete direction. All that matters is that it’s my OWN ground. I’ve built it step by step and day by day with my own choices and not to please anyone else.

The sooner we come to grasp the importance of this, the sooner we will learn to get rid of the need to fulfil someone else’s expectations. Yes, home is our teacher but eventually, we have to learn to teach ourselves. And when it is time to teach, you think about what you would do differently and what you will continue to carrying on with you.

Find your ground by building it yourself!
You will find that your stance in life will change as you become more in line with your truth – not the one that was made for you.