How to Enjoy Your Life When It Goes Not as You Expected

How to Enjoy Your Life When It Goes Not as You Expected

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We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. –Joseph Campbell

I didn’t plan this—the life I have. It’s supposed to be different. For the last five years, I’ve felt confused and disappointed. I couldn’t believe that the challenges I met in the life didn’t depend on my choices. It was a habit to think that my wrong decisions were the reasons of bad luck; it was a habit to feel guilty.

But what if it is all nonsense, and there are no reasons? What if there is no explanation? Just chain of random events that have nothing in common with destiny?

It is too scary to admit that mainly life is out of our control. But it’s necessary to do it if you want not to exist but live.

Life happens, and it isn’t about us  

When I was looking for the words of comfort on the Internet, I understood I was not the only one who was scary. Moreover, I realized that many were so frightened that they’d rather shifted the responsibility to someone or something else than admitted there was no responsible.

No matter which names we give them—God, Universe, fate. It changes nothing. Believers who claim someone has a better plan for us still look for the consolation. They keep searching for the reasons for the mess in their lives, and they find it in something incomprehensible—mysterious and powerful creatures that manage their lives. The work is done. Now they can keep wallowing in self-pity and waiting for a windfall to come.

Stop deluding yourself. There is no purpose of our existence at the scale of the universe. We are the fruits of our parents’ love. Period.

Do not exaggerate your mission; accept the life you got and learn to appreciate it.

Misfortune is common

Sometimes it seems that people around have perfect lives. Someone gives the name to their daughter you’ve always wanted to give yours, but you can’t—cause of infertility. Someone buys a house with a backyard you’ve dreamt of spending your weekends at, but you can’t—cause of necessity to help your sick parents financially. Someone gets married their beloved, and you don’t—cause you’re gay and your country doesn’t allow gay marriages.

There are as many severities as people on Earth. Diseases, cataclysms, wars. Awful things are happening all the time. But we are not in charge of them. It is the world we have and we need to deal with it—smiling or crying—here is the choice we make.

Change your heading

You tried to stick to the route, but your devices broke down. You don’t know what is next. Time to panic? No way! Let your fears go, and discover. Life is so incredible and diverse that you’ll never get bored exploring it.

However, to enjoy it you need to adhere to one crucial condition—no questions. Stop asking yourself why your life goes not as you expected. This question has no answer. The only thing it involves is destruction. If you want to take the most of your life, get rid of it. 

Do not sit on the ruins of your dreams whining and pitying yourself; use the resources you have to live the life that is happening right now.

Do things you’ve always thought you’d do some day starting today. There is no reason to wait.

Maneuver, and then keep moving

Life is a movement. When something gets you stuck, it turns into a run in place—exhausting but ineffectually. Deal with the problem that holds you back, and take a new start.

Everyone has dozens of hidden dreams they never fulfilled alluding to their insignificance and futility. We treat them suchlike tending to achieve global goals first. So, we keep knocking on the closed doors over and over, torturing ourselves but hoping for the best.

It is nothing but wasting your life.  

Yes, your life doesn’t mean a lot to the Universe but it does to you. Actually, you are the only person who really cares. So, why on Earth you keep wasting it? Turn around. There are many other doors.

You are the one who makes your life meaningful. Change the perspective but do not stop dreaming. Let yourself do things you’ve always been postponed. Try yourself in art, sport, handicraft. Travel. Volunteer. Learn.

Do things you’ve always thought you’d do some day starting today. There is no reason to wait. Life is happening right now. So, leave the auditorium and go on stage— the performance won’t be given without the lead.

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