“True happiness means forging a strong spirit that is undefeated, no matter how trying our circumstances.” – Daisaku Ikeda
Awesome Tips to Help You Recover from a Setback in Life
Think about the unhealthy behaviors in your life. Maybe it is food, an addiction, smoking, or negative self-talk. Now think about all the steps it will take to get from unhealthy to healthy. Feel overwhelmed yet?
If you do, then you join the millions of Americans who harbor a fear of hopelessness about a “cure” for what ails their troubled mind. But what you may not know is that same troubled mind is capable of setting a world record and it all begins tomorrow morning when you wake up.
There are three core problems surrounding change:
You see and aim for the long term while ignoring the immediate
You fear the impossibility of the task at hand
You compare your recovery to the recovery of others
These three obstacles are the toughest to beat but each one of them is easily destroyed with a little perspective.
When you try to recover for unhealthy behavior, you look at your long-term goals first. You want to lose 45 pounds in 18 months. You want to save $3,000 for a vacation. You want to stop smoking by January. These are respectable and measurable goals but lack a very important factor; the efforts you need to accomplish today. This is the opposite of the old idiom that you can’t see the forest for the trees. Instead, you may be having difficulty seeing the trees in the forest.
People who focus only on the end game are lacking the immediate detail. An example is a person trying to obtain sobriety. During the magical “pink cloud phase,” when everything seems to work perfectly, addicts and alcoholics may parrot the phrase, “I’m just going to stop using.” The real question is “how”?
When this oversight occurs you might fear the impossible because you have set your task as point A to point B. When you look only at the end result, a simple slip up or natural digression can lead to feelings of failure. Don’t worry when these fallbacks occur. Remember to remain human. Your world record is coming!
Another fatal error is comparing your recovery to anyone but yourself. Each person and their recovery varies from yours by a million different variable. It does not mean your methods or actions are better or worse. They are just different. Remember the only uphill obstacle you face is you. Fortunately, I have a little secret for you that will soothe all your fears and bring you your world record:
…you are stronger than the person you see in the mirror.
So what is this world record? It’s simple
All you have to do is last a little longer than the day before, and you have surmounted a goal worthy of the Guinness Book. The entire sport begins with the simplest concept: delay.
When you have an unhealthy behavior that has lasted months, years or decades, it can be exceptionally difficult to break. However, difficult does not equal impossible. Start with the easiest of delays and think no more of it until the next day. For example, if you smoke each morning at 9:00 AM, wait until 9:05 AM. Then, engage the behavior. It may be difficult at first, but these are the challenges and pains we face when we desire to change. Congratulations. You have just set a world record.
Look again at the three core problems from your new perspective.
You aimed for the immediate. You did not attack the long term goal but you chipped away.
You have proven the impossible is possible. You went an extra five minutes without that cigarette.
You set a world record. Not for your county, state, country, or planet, but for the only “nation” that matters; you.
When you stop comparing, you will see victories because the only “best” that needs to be beaten is your “personal best.”
Because you worked an immediate goal, you proved that it is not impossible. It will not seem suddenly easy, but you have the evidence that you can go for a small amount of time against the daunting odds of a sometimes lifelong behavior. Then after 5 minutes seems like small peanuts, aim for 10 minutes. Then 15. Then a half hour. Before you know it, you will be setting world records at a dizzying pace and going days or weeks or even extinguished the behavior. It all leads to a healthier mindset and a stronger you! You’ll be more powerful than the person in the mirror was yesterday.
Remember that no matter who tells you that you cannot, even if it is your own voice; you absolutely can!