I guess we can all agree that it’s not that hard to start a relationship. It’s not exactly rocket science. What is really important is your desire to save a relationship and make it last for long years to come. We are all different in the way we perceive and react on things in life. Misunderstandings lead us to the vortex of negativity and aggravation with each other. There are many things to consider to make a relationship work. But let’s focus today on little reminders to save a relationship and make it stronger.
6 Suggestions to Improve a Relationship
1. Yes, I Hear You
I will never get tired of repeating that we all have two ears and only one mouth for a GOOD reason. Unlike our mouth, our ears never get us in trouble.
It is very important to learn to really LISTEN, to be grounded and present in the moment when your other half shares something with you.
When you have contrasting sets of interests and, unlike her, you couldn’t care less about taking up yoga classes or listen about them – keep your disinterest locked. If she shares with you something, it indicates that it is something valuable to her and she would feel closer by sharing it with you. Even better, how about finding something that would be appealing to you in the subject your partner is interested in?
The more common grounds you find together, the better connected you are and the more topics you have to discuss.
It is important to hear and be heard.
2. Time Out NEEDED
Regardless of how great you are together and your desire to spend literally every second of the day holding hands, it is a good thing to keep some time of the day to yourself. It is a good thing to be in the fortress of solitude for a short while. Take a time to think, have time for yourself.
But I’m not talking about closing from the world for the whole day. It should be balanced.
3. Trust Is Like an Eraser
Trust is like an eraser, it gets thinner with every mistake. We lie about things. Small and big. The fewer pitfalls you have, the fewer chances you have of tripping over your lies.
We can lie to the whole world. We will never run away from ourselves with that lie. The fewer worries about keeping up lies you have in your mind the better you sleep at night.
4. Compromises & Adjustments
When we really want to reduce stress from having a fight we need to think critically about compromises from both sides.
You may have different opinions on one subject. And both of your opinions are valuable. Both of you are entitled to your opinions and you both should respect that.
And when argument rises up, search for the common ground that would satisfy you both.
5. It’s Not a Competition, Baby!
Look, there are things we do that we are best at. Better than anyone else in the world. And when we are arrogant about being better than your better half, it puts a strain on a relationship. If you do something worse than your partner, you may feel bitter, but remember, it should not be a competition. You should encourage your partner to keep improving and learn from him or her. Sometimes it is better to work together and divide responsibilities according to your skills. That way you relationship as a whole together with your common goals and dreams will work as a well-oiled machine.
Then there are other activities where one of you will obviously be better than the other. If you always win when playing cards or a board game together, try not to make such a big deal of that. Otherwise, you will be playing alone next time.
The only person we should compete with is our past self.
There is no such thing as a relationship free from any sort of arguments or disputes. If there is one in existence, I would love to see it.
What we should remember is that we need to think before we say something heavy. Think before you speak. Don’t say something permanently nasty when you are temporary upset! You may not feel the same way a few minutes later, but your words will be remembered for years.
When we have an argument we should concentrate our attention on finding solutions to the dispute that lead to that. Don’t get forced out of reason. There is no need to put all the grudges and missteps in the same blender to chop them till there’s nothing left.
If you feel like you are about to explode, just use the “STOP” sign to catch your breath and refrain yourself from saying something hurtful. Both of you should use it in your relationship. Say STOP and have time to clear your mind and change perspective.
Finding common grounds is vital in reducing irritations in relationships.