By Rachael Everly
“You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.” – JK Rowling
A Helpful Guide for ALL Emotionally Sensitive People Out There
Every person in this world has their own individual traits that set them apart from each other. These traits could vary on the basis of appearance, their preferences, and their health. However, the most distinctive of all these characteristics is the ability to feel emotions.
While everyone reacts to a situation in a different way, one thing stands out for some people; the amount of time they take to process and react to the situation. These emotionally sensitive individuals think and feel a lot more deeply than most people.
This personality trait was discovered by Ph.D. Elaine N. Aron in the early years of the 1990s. Until that time the trait was not recognized globally. However, with her study, she concluded that the condition is relatively common as one in five people possess these traits. It is also important to note that while this is considered a part of mental health, it cannot be regarded as an illness that demands treatment. These individuals are:
- More reactive emotionally.
- They feel more than other individuals; irrespective of the fact whether the situation is positive or negative.
- They prefer doing activities solo and are “more likely” introverts.
- Take longer time in making decisions as they pay more attention to details.
- Despite the fact that they like working alone, they can still bond well with people due to emotions getting the best of them
While the above-mentioned characteristics are true for emotionally sensitive people, they are faced with a lot more challenges in their life than any other person who doesn’t have a sensitive emotional system. Being sensitive can play host to a lot of problems for a person and can definitely hinder their success.
Social Anxiety
People who feel a lot more deeply than others have a tendency to be scared of facing the world. This makes them socially awkward, especially among new people. The condition can prevent people from bonding quickly but the damage doesn’t end here. Despite knowing the people around them, an emotionally sensitive person can still develop social anxiety if they feel threatened by their peers in form of an insult, a joke or being pressurized into doing something.
Stress
Stress is a part and parcel of every human’s life, yet emotionally sensitive people can get more easily stressed as compared to the people with normal emotional levels. This is because they take their time to analyze things with more detail and if a situation is not favorable they will end up worrying more than they should. The time they take to process anything and to reach a decision only adds to their worries, making them more vulnerable to stress.
“It isn’t what happens to us that causes us to suffer; it’s what we say to ourselves about what happens.” – Pema Chodron
Depression
Regardless of whether the person is young or old, depression can occur in any form for any reason. Although it is not the defining trait for the emotionally sensitive individuals, but it is one of the many downsides of feeling too much. It is because the person is always considering where, how when they did wrong and over assuming things that meant nothing in the eyes of other people. Self-blaming and finding faults in themselves for the mistakes that they did are reasons for being depressed.
Pushover
Another downside of being emotionally sensitive is the amount of pushing and bullying one may get for their display of emotions. They are easy vulnerable and other people can impact their decisions easily. They can be manipulated into doing something that they do not want and in order to please people and hence become pushovers.
All these problems affiliated with the display of too many emotions may have the capacity to hinder in someone’s life. Yet there are ways to avoid such situations and get over this difficulty you are facing. The process starts with you recognizing that you are a person who is very emotionally active. Once you have realized that, you need to selectively communicate with the people. The ones who are close to you and you trust them can be the ones who may see your emotional side. On the other hand, your acquaintances and your colleagues and people you meet randomly need not know every detail about you or your problems.
To get through your days without losing control of what you are doing, practice patience, calmness, and focus. You can adhere to these qualities by:
- Sitting in a room and remembering everything good that happened that day, instead of remembering all the negative aspects.
- Doing yoga, meditation and exercises that demands focus and determination.
- Listening to upbeat music, watching positive videos and taking interest in yourself rather than shift focus on someone else’s harsh words.
- Always remember, that this time too shall pass, and you will soon forget about it.
Keeping in mind all the things mentioned above can highly affect the person’s way of life and how they perceive things. It is always better to learn to help yourself first and proceed from there. There is no harm in being an emotionally sensitive person, and it is not a mental illness either, but not everyone deserves to know your vulnerabilities.